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Well if those two things are all that you want to do, then you could use a Perl snippet for each. First off all, if your comptuer is freezing due to your JavaScript, then it means that your JavaScript is probably bad. Post it and i'll check it out. Secondly, you can do the Perl snippet one of two ways. If you have access to edit your server configuration, then you can use SSI (or if your service provider allows it). If you can't do that, then you can use Perl to display JavaScript.
I can show you how to do both, just tell me what you need.
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